We’re approaching the end of the year. Soon 2012 will be in the books. It’s the holiday season. Christmas is upon us. How do I feel about that? Blah. Really. Blah. It doesn’t feel like Christmas and as such I am not in the spirit. A lot has happened to take my mind off the holiday season but to be honest it’s been this way for years now. To me, Christmas is just another holiday. A hyped and anticipated one, but just another period. I like the time between Christmas and New Year’s. The best time of the year. Things are relaxed. It’s not nearly as cold as it will get when were fully into winter. People are not working or working not as hard as they usually do. Plenty of Football games to keep one preoccupied. I’m just gonna go with it. Ah sweet freedom!
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I watched a movie over the weekend. Didn’t catch the name of it, but it was one of those body-switch movies. Two lifelong friends switch lives. One is a bachelor living the single life while the other is a happily married family guy. As they switch they both begin to appreciate the good and the bad involved in their new lives. It resonated some. I, of course, sympathized and associated with the single guy both playing the role as family man and as with the single life lived by the family guy. This dynamic is real to me in that I see it both in the people I know today. My friends and peers who are at both stages. I realize being single has it’s great perks, esp. the freedom. But family life is not something to shun. It has it’s own rewards. It’s something I don’t think you realize until you live it. Like a lot of things, “The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.” I wonder for myself…What I may be like had I been a family man now? It’s cringe-worthy for me now but who’s to say this isn’t the best thing for me? I’ve had a taste of it and it does have it’s own rewards. Surely there must be a happy medium?
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Talking to a well-respected guy I know he brought up a hypothetical question to me.
“What would you do to make the world a better place?”
He gave me a moment to think. Not about some fantasy answer that provided an unrealistic scenario…No something real that could very well happen. My answer was that I felt that everyone who’s ever been falsely imprisoned should be set free. I think of guys today who are being freed after years in jail when evidence showed they were innocent. What a nightmare! The guy surmised that I had a sense of fairness. That fairness was important to me. It is. He countered with another thought-provoking answer:
“People should not get something for nothing.”
The idea is that people should give to get. There should be no free rides. It’s a recipe for disaster. I had to agree. Weeks beforehand I had seen a video by a self-help guru who said just as much. The world is made up of “Givers” and “Takers”. Those who take what is given to them and those who provide for others. He said of the “Takers” that they were stealing. Providing nothing while expecting everything. I , too agreed. My guy felt that no one should get anything without producing something back in kind. I like that idea. It’s Karma really. You get what you put out in the world. It’s true to me and I think that is what I wish upon those who have been both good to me and bad to me. Get what you deserve. That is the best reward/revenge.
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This weekend my celebrity crush spent time down in Miami with her BFF. I adore them both, the BFF more and more than the crush. They look amazing together. I told them they look like sisters and they now use that line (some credit please!). It brought back a memory of a birthday I had when I banged these two chicks in a hotel room. My present to myself. I had a good time and checked off a line item on the bucket list. But I remember it was draining. Two women at once in what wasn’t quite a threesome is exhausting. Takes a lot of stamina and self-control. As much as I liked doing it I realized this isn’t for me. Well not quite like that! Of course I referenced that experience to these two hotties. I seriously doubt I could have that scenario happen with them, but one can dream. Actually I think I’d just as well call it a Life after that. Just head to the afterlife with a pleasant memory. It’s the ultimate guy fantasy and something that has put a sly smile on my face of late.
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Had an interesting encounter last week as well. I bought something from Walmart and got cash back in the transaction. I don’t usually do this but I didn’t have any cash on me. A new $20 bill. Something told me ,as I walked past a bank, “Break this bill!” I didn’t. Instead I stopped by a liquor store and, after scouring the beers, chose a cheap beer to drink. The guy gave me change and, after checking my $450 million dollar Powerball ticket, left. I didn’t win…LOL! But when I got home realized the clerk shorted me $5 in change. I faced a question” Get back up and get my change or just let it slide?” The movie “Red Tails” was on and it was interesting. I decided to go back and get the change. I did so with a thought in my head….I went in and a pretty Asian woman explained things. Basically she said “No”. I was understanding. I didn’t make a scene nor try to negotiate. Instead I politely accepted her answer and left. Part of me felt like arguing (The Philly side) and part of me said “Let it go”. Walking back I knew this could be the case and I knew that despite the error it was my fault for not counting my change nor changing it at a bank. I had a mixed feeling. Part felt “less-manly” for not standing up for myself and part felt righteous for realizing the error and being mature enough to deal with my own fuck-up. I let it go and pretty much forgot about it. “God will provide for me something in return for this” is what I thought. I think that’s what being a Man is really about. Admitting your mistakes and taking them in stride. Still the proper thing for them to do would have been to reimburse me or let me have something equal to the $5 they know they shorted me on. I’ve let it go and I feel like a better person for doing so.
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Last is this…
The Black Architecture Group I’m a part of has been strangely silent of late. No real news even as we approach the end of the year. It’s significant because the current President is about to end his last term of office as per the bylaws. We also have a Christmas party coming up. I’ve heard little about either situation and I have to wonder…WTF!? Part of it is that I’ve been MIA for weeks now. I still stay in touch but am not present in things. Still I’m surprised no one wants to keep me in the loop. I think I know why. It’s because all year I didn’t pay my dues. It almost cost us a coveted award. But I’m the First Vice-President and the only one who seemed committed to keeping us connected via social media. I’m also the most senior person in the group. I could run things and have now decided I don’t want to. Not because of this, but because I think my interest are best served in a group that will better help me personally than this one can. It’s just the better deal for me professionally. But the snub is stupid really. As much help this group needs in doing what they aspire to do, you just don’t dismiss those who can and will help you. It’s left me somewhat dumbfounded, hence I choose to keep my distance. My value to the group will become more apparent in my absence. In fact it sets the stage for a glorious return. The group isn’t living up to it’s potential. I have a plan to make it do just that. If I can come in when they’re down and turn things around, my impact will be exponentially bigger and better. So I play a political card and step back and wait to come in and do things the right way. It feels weird but it’s the right play. The blah to end 2012 can lead to the excitement and thrills of 2013. Maybe that’s the real reason why I just sit back and wait? How clever J
LRJ ~
lrj4life 